What Surfing, Sitcoms, and Emotions Have in Common

When I was a kid, Friday nights were the highlight of my week.

I’d race to the candy store with whatever change I could find and load up on Jolly Ranchers and Sweet Tarts. I’d bike home, skid into the backyard, and slide onto the living room carpet just as the TGIF theme song started. Four sitcoms. All the candy. Pure freedom.

But the magic wasn’t just the sugar or the shows—it was the feeling. That buzz of excitement and carefreeness that still lives in my body decades later.

That memory reminded me how powerful emotions are. They drive so many of our decisions—what we do, avoid, or delay. And recently, I came across a concept that’s changed how I think about emotions:

🌊 The 6-Second Rule

Research suggests that the initial chemical surge behind an emotion lasts about 6 seconds.
That first rush? Just a wave.

Then, it takes about 90 seconds for those chemicals to process through your body unless you feed it with new thoughts that keep the emotion cycling.

In other words:
You don’t need to control the wave.
You just need to ride it—or let it pass.

This came up recently while helping my daughter prepare for a performance. She sometimes gets overwhelmed by nerves. But when we pause and recognize the emotion as a wave, it starts to settle.

And it reminded me of something else: learning to surf.
You don’t fight every wave. You feel it rise… and then choose.
Do I ride this one in?
Or let it pass?

🏄‍♂️ Try This:

When you feel overwhelmed, anxious, or excited—try singing the first few lines of the Beach Boys’ “Surfin’ Safari.”

“Let’s go surfing now, everybody’s learning how, come on and safari with me…”

It’s about 8 seconds long—just enough time for that first chemical reaction to pass. After that, you can choose to act—or not.

Feel it. Surf it. Then decide.

Next week, I’ll share what to do after that pause—how to ride the wave when you’re ready to use emotion as fuel for action.

Until then:
Don’t fear the wave.
Just learn how to surf it.

To being seen, heard, and feeling it all—
Matt


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Hi, I’m Matt Kjar- an Emmy award winning photographer and producer who found coaching when I was going through my own existential expansion, (watch more about that here) and knew that coaching was, well, life-changing.

I had over 20 years of experience working in television, interviewing celebrities, working with the Olympics, and telling people’s stories, but this was different. Coaching felt more mind-bending than what I’d experienced before, and I knew I had to help get this work out into the world.

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